Colossians 3:20-25

 

 

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Colossians 3:20 Children, be obedient  (2PPAM) to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord. (NASB: Lockman)

Greek: Ta tekna, hupakouete (2PPAM) tois goneusin kata panta, touto gar euareston estin (3SPAI) en kurio
Amplified: Children, obey your parents in everything, for this is pleasing to the Lord. (Amplified Bible - Lockman)
KJV: Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.
NLT: You children must always obey your parents, for this is what pleases the Lord. (
NLT - Tyndale House)
Wuest
: Children, be obeying your parents in all things, for this is commendable in the Lord. (
Erdmans
Young's Literal: the children! obey the parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord;

References

Analytical Greek
Paul Apple
Albert Barnes
Thomas Constable
Explore Bible
Faith Bible Church
Adam Clarke
Bruce Goettsche
Bruce Goettsche
Bruce Goettsche
Bruce Goettsche
Dave Guzik
Matthew Henry
F B Hole
IVP Commentary
Jamieson, F, B
S Lewis Johnson
William Kelly
Keith Krell
J B Lightfoot
John MacArthur
J Vernon McGee
Phil Newton
Phil Newton
John Piper
Grant Richison
Grant Richison
A T Robertson
C H Spurgeon
C H Spurgeon
C H Spurgeon
Ray Stedman
Today in the Word

Marvin Vincent
Precept Ministries
Our Daily Bread

Colossians 3 (tenses)
Colossians Commentary - 139 page Pdf
Colossians 3
Colossians
(Pdf)
Colossians 3: Teacher Aids
Colossians 3:20 3:21 3:22-4:2 3:22-4:2
Colossians 3
Colossians 16-17 Well-Balanced Christian Life

Colossians 3:20 To the Children in All of Us

Colossians 3:21 God's Message to Parents

Colossians 3:22-4:1 God and Your Job
Colossians 3
Colossians 3
Colossians
Colossians 3
Colossians 3
Colossians 3:18-4:1 New Man Old Relationship (Audio)
Colossians
Colossians 3:22-4:1 Take This Job and Love It!
Colossians Paraphrase
Colossians 3:18- 4:1 New Man Makes a New Home
Colossians 3:17-21 Mp3  3:22-25 Mp3
Colossians 3:20-21 Sanctification: A New Family, Part 2

Colossians 3:22-4:1 Sanctification: A New Attitude

Colossians 3:21 Fathers Who Give Hope
Colossians 3:20 20b 20c 20d 21 21b 21c
Colossians 3:22
22b 22c 23 23b 24 25

Colossians 3: Greek Word Studies
Colossians 3:24 Devotional
Colossians 3:24 All for Jesus- Pdf
Colossians 3 Expositional Notes
Colossians 3:18-4:6: Living Christianly
Colossians 3:23 Colossians 3:23
Colossians 3: Greek Word Studies
Colossians: Download Lesson 1 of 12
Colossians 3:23: Eternal Significance
Colossians 3:23: What's My Ministry?
Colossians 3:23: Be All There 3:23: Glory In The Grind
Colossians 3:23: Give It Your Best! 3:23: More Than Just A Job
Colossians 3:23: Mary and God 3:23: Tomorrow Trap
Colossians 3:23 Matters Of The Heart 3:23 Keep the Workday Holy
Colossians 3:23 Working In God's Garden 3:23 When Nobody Notices
Colossians 3:23: The Smallest Place 3:24: Mudpies And Motives

CHILDREN BE OBEDIENT TO YOUR PARENTS IN ALL THINGS: Ta tekna, hupakouete (2PPAM) tois goneusin kata panta: (Genesis 28:7; Exodus 20:12; Leviticus 19:3; Deuteronomy 21:18-21; 27:16; Proverbs 6:20; 20:20; Proverbs 30:11,17; Ezekiel 22:7; Malachi 1:6; Matthew 15:4-6; 19:19; see sermon notes on Spirit filled families Ephesians 6:1-3) (Ephesians 5:24; see note Titus 2:9)

See related resource - in depth notes on parallel passages in Ephesians 6:1; Ephesians 6:2; Ephesians 6:3

Be obedient (5219) (hupakouo from from hupó = under + akoúo = hear) (Click word study on hupakouo) (Click for study of related word hupakoe) means literally to hear where the idea of "under" is consciously, volitionally (act of one's will) subordinating one’s self to the person or thing heard and hence “to obey” or to hearken (give respectful attention). It includes the idea of listening attentively, stillness, or attention.

The idea of hupakouo is that the one hearing is under the authority of another and thus conveys the meanings of calling for compliance (disposition to yield to another) with the demands or requests of another. Submitting to that which is heard involves a change of attitude, forsaking the tendency of the fallen nature to rebel against parental or Divine instructions and commands and seeking God's will, not self will.

The present imperative is a command calling for this attitude and action to be the child's lifestyle.

All things means no exceptions (as long of course as what the parents are asking is concordant with God's will and walking in a manner worthy of the Lord and is not sin. (see related sermon notes on Spirit filled families Ephesians 6:1-3)

Note that this relationship cannot be right unless first the husband-wife relationship is right. In the ancient world children were very much under the domination of their parents. The supreme example was the Roman Patria Potestas, "the law of the father's power" which granted the parent the right to do anything he liked with his child - the parent could sell the child into slavery, could make him work like a laborer on his farm and even had the right to condemn his child to death and to carry out the execution! Such is the perspective of the depraved mind when the gospel of Jesus Christ is not enthroned therein! In pagan society, all the privileges and rights belonged to the parent and all the duties to the child.

FOR THIS IS WELL-PLEASING TO THE LORD: touto gar euareston estin (3SPAI) en kurio: (see note Colossians 1:10
; see note Philippians 4:18; Hebrews 13:21)

What is the motive? That we might please our Lord Jesus, the One Who appointed to exercise absolute ownership and supreme authority in every believer's life (both Christian parents and children). The way children obey their parent's authority reflects their obedience to Jesus and ultimately represents submission/acceptance of God's design for order (the opposite of order is chaos and because of rebellion we see that in so many families in our modern, "liberated, evolved" society) We need to remember God's assessment that rebellion and disobedience

is as the sin of divination (or witchcraft!), and insubordination is as iniquity and idolatry.  (1 Samuel 15:23)

Well pleasing (2101) (euarestos from eu = well + arésko = please) (Click for in depth study of euarestos) means that which causes someone to be pleased. It is something which is well approved, eminently satisfactory, or extra-ordinarily pleasing. It is possible to obey externally, but not “from the heart” (see sermon note Ephesians 6:6). It is possible obey grudgingly.

In Romans we can see a sense of what euarestos means where Paul writes that the will of God is

"good and acceptable (euarestos) and perfect."  (see notes Romans 12:2)

God's will is well-pleasing because you cannot add anything to the will of God and in any way improve it. You could not take anything away from it and make it better. God's will is totally acceptable. And this is the attitude and actions Paul is calling for in children as well as in every saint in Romans 12 where he exhorts us

"by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable (euarestos) to God, which is your spiritual service of worship." (see notes Romans 12:1)

In using euarestos Paul borrows from Old Testament sacrificial language to describe the kind of holy living that God approves, a “living sacrifice” that is morally and spiritually spotless and without blemish, and which He finds well-pleasing.

 

Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not exasperate  (2PPAMyour children, so that they will not lose heart (3PPAS) (NASB: Lockman)

Greek: Hoi pateres, me erethizete (2PPAM) ta tekna humon, hina me athumosin. (3PPAS)
GWT: Fathers, don't make your children resentful, or they will become discouraged.
ICB: Fathers, do not nag your children. If you are too hard to please, they may want to stop trying.
KJV: Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.
NLT: Fathers, don't aggravate your children. If you do, they will become discouraged and quit trying. (
NLT - Tyndale House)
Amplified: Fathers, do not provoke or irritate or fret your children [do not be hard on them or harass them], lest they become discouraged and sullen and morose and feel inferior and frustrated. [Do not break their spirit.]
(Amplified Bible - Lockman)
NLT: Fathers, don't aggravate your children. If you do, they will become discouraged and quit trying. (NLT - Tyndale House)
Wuest
: Fathers, stop irritating your children, lest they become disheartened. (
Erdmans
Young's Literal: the fathers! vex not your children, lest they be discouraged.

FATHERS DO NOT EXASPERATE YOUR CHILDREN: hoi pateres, me erethizete (2PPAM) ta tekna humon:  (Psalms 103:13; Proverbs 3:12; 4:1-4; Ephesians 6:4; 1 Thessalonians 2:11; Hebrews 12:5-11)

stop nagging your kids

stop irritating your kids to the point that it produces resentment

Spurgeon writes that...

The duties are mutual. Scripture maintains an equilibrium. It does not lay down commands for one class, and then leave the other to exercise whatever tyrannical oppression it may please. The child is to obey, but the father must not provoke.

See related resource - in depth notes on parallel passage in Ephesians 6:4

Exasperate (2042) (erethizo from erétho = stir to anger) means to stop provoking (present imperative with a negative = stop an action that may already be in process) your children to the point that they become bitter and resentful. The idea is to arouse, excite, kindle as in this verse  in a bad sense, thus making resentful, irritating or rousing to anger.

A secular use of erethizo was in reference to fire, the Greek sentence rendered "a spark kindled by the bellows", which gives us an accurate picture of the potential effect of a father inappropriately disciplining his children!

Other secular Greek uses include "to provoke to curiosity", in the passive "to be provoked or excited".

In secular writings we find the sentence "a sparked kindled (erethizo) by the bellows" which helps understand the potential effect insensitive, in the flesh punishing can have on a child. Erethizo means to cause someone to feel resentment = make resentful, make someone bitter, to excite anger, to provoke, to irritate. In the only other NT use of erethizo, erethizo is used in a positive sense meaning to encourage or motivate (provoke positively stimulating a change in motivation or attitude. ).

For I know your readiness (eagerness), of which I boast about you to the Macedonians, namely, that Achaia has been prepared since last year, and your zeal has stirred up (erethizo) most of them. (2Cor 9:2)

Remember that the context is important to keep in mind lest we try not to exasperate in our own strength. Going back to Colossians 3:16 (or go back to the beginning of the chapter for who we now are in Christ Colossians 3:1-2, which in turn is based on the truths in the first two chapters) the ideal father should

"let the word of Christ richly dwell within...with all wisdom teaching and admonishing..."

and so filled with the Word and the Spirit, training up his child in a godly way.

O
ne can exasperate by...

(1) Overprotection--never allowing them any liberty, strict rules about everything. They do not trust their kids and the child despairs and can lead to rebellion. Parents must communicate that they trust.

(2) By showing favoritism, often unwittingly.

(3) By depreciating their worth. Many children are convinced that what they do and feel is not important. One way to decrease worth is by not LISTENING. These children may give up trying to communicate and become discouraged, shy, and withdrawn.

(4) By setting unrealistic goals--by never rewarding them. Nothing is enough so they never get full approval. Are you trying to make them into a person they are NOT? Some kids become so frustrated that they commit suicide.

(5) By failing to show affection (verbally & physically).

(6) By not providing for their legitimate needs.

(7) By lack of standards (the opposite of overprotection). These children are left to their own. They cannot handle that freedom and begin to feel insecure & unloved.

(8) By destructive criticism. "A child learns what he lives. If he lives with criticism he does not learn responsibility. He learns to condemn himself and to find fault with others. He learns to doubt his own judgment, to disparage his own ability, and to distrust the intentions of others. And above all, he learns to live with continual expectation of impending doom." Parents should seek to create in the home a positive, constructive environment.

(9) By neglect. David was indifferent to Absalom (and he failed to discipline Adonijah see 1Ki 1:6 who was put to death by his younger brother Solomon for probable treason).

(10) By excessive discipline. Never discipline in anger.

THAT THEY MAY NOT LOSE HEART: hina me athumosin (3PPAS):

Lose heart (120) (athumeo from a = without + thumos = passions, desire, spirit) means to become disheartened to the point of losing motivation, to be dispirited or to be broken in spirit.  To feel like giving up. To despond. In this context, it means that the child feels that he can never do anything right and so gives up trying. When children find that they can do nothing right because of constant faultfinding with them, they are apt to become despondent.

This is the only NT use of athumeo. Here are the 7 uses of athumeo in the Septuagint (LXX) (Deut. 28:65; 1 Sam. 1:6f; 15:11; 2 Sam. 6:8; 1 Chr. 13:11; Isa. 25:4 )

The duty of the parent is discipline, but it is also encouragement.

The point is that children who grow up with parents who continually (present tense) provoke them will become disheartened.

Paul wrote to his "spiritual children" reminding them

"how we were exhorting and encouraging and imploring each one of you as a father would his own children." (1Th 2:11).

Proverbs 19:18 encourages parents to

"Discipline your son while there is hope & do not desire his death."

Proverbs 18:14 is a direct parallel to Paul's command in Colossians, instructing the wise father that

"the spirit of a man can endure his sickness, but a broken spirit who can bear?"

Barclay writes this cautionary note...

The more conscientious a parent is, the more he is likely always to be correcting and rebuking the child. Simply because he wishes the child to do well, he is always on his top.

We remember, for instance, the tragic question of Mary Lamb, whose mind was ultimately unhinged:

“Why is it that I never seem to be able to do anything to please my mother?”

We remember the poignant statement of John Newton:

“I know that my father loved me—but he did not seem to wish me to see it.”

There is a certain kind of constant criticism which is the product of misguided love.

The danger of all this is that the child may become discouraged. Bengel speaks of

“the plague of youth, a broken spirit (Fractus animus pestis iuventutis).”

It is one of the tragic facts of religious history that Luther’s father was so stern to him that Luther all his days found it difficult to pray: “Our Father.” The word father in his mind stood for nothing but severity. The duty of the parent is discipline, but it is also encouragement. Luther himself said,

“Spare the rod and spoil the child. It is true. But beside the rod keep an apple to give him when he does well.”

Sir Arnold Lunn, in Memory to Memory, quotes an incident about Field-Marshal Montgomery from a book by M. E. Clifton James. Montgomery was famous as a disciplinarian—but there was another side to him. Clifton James was his official “double” and was studying him during a rehearsal for D-Day.

“Within a few yards of where I was standing, a very young soldier, still looking sea-sick from his voyage, came struggling along gamely trying to keep up with his comrades in front. I could imagine that, feeling as he did, his rifle and equipment must have been like a ton weight. His heavy boots dragged in the sand, but I could see that he was fighting hard to conceal his distress. Just when he got level with us he tripped up and fell flat on his face. Half sobbing, he heaved himself up and began to march off dazedly in the wrong direction. Monty went straight up to him and with a quick, friendly smile turned him round. ‘This way, sonny. You’re doing well—very well. But don’t lose touch with the chap in front of you.’ When the youngster realized who it was that had given him friendly help, his expression of dumb adoration was a study.”

It was just because Montgomery combined discipline and encouragement that a private in the Eighth Army felt himself as good as a colonel in any other army.

The better a parent is the more he must avoid the danger of discouraging his child, for he must give discipline and encouragement in equal parts. (Barclay, W: The Letters to the Philippians, Colossians, and Thessalonians. Philadelphia: The Westminster Press)

 

Colossians 3:22 Slaves, in all things obey  (2PPAM those who are your masters on earth, not with external service, as those who merely please men, but  with sincerity of heart, fearing (PPPMPN the Lord.

Greek: hoi douloi, hupakouete (2PPAM) kata panta tois kata sarka (those according to flesh)  kuriois,  me en ophthalmodoulia (eye slavery) os anthropareskoi, (men pleasers) all' en haploteti kardias phoboumenoi (PPPMPN) ton kurion.
Amplified: Servants, obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not only when their eyes are on you as pleasers of men, but in simplicity of purpose [with all your heart] because of your reverence for the Lord and as a sincere expression of your devotion to Him.  (Amplified Bible - Lockman)
KJV: Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eyeservice, as men pleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God:
NLT: You slaves must obey your earthly masters in everything you do. Try to please them all the time, not just when they are watching you. Obey them willingly because of your reverent fear of the Lord. (NLT - Tyndale House)
Wuest
: Slaves, be constantly obedient in all things to your human masters, not with eye-service as men-pleasers, but with an undivided heart, fearing the Lord. (
Erdmans
Young's Literal: The servants! obey in all things those who are masters according to the flesh, not in eye-service as men-pleasers, but in simplicity of heart, fearing God;

SLAVES IN ALL THINGS OBEY THOSE WHO ARE YOUR MASTERS ON EARTH: hoi douloi, hupakouete (2PPAM) kata panta tois kata sarka kuriois: (Ep6:5 adds with fear and trembling, in the sincerity of your heart, as to Christ) (20