FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL
LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE: anti toutou kataleipsei (3SFAI) anthropos
[ton] patera kai proskollethesetai (3SFPI) pros ten gunaika autou: (Genesis
2:24; Matthew 19:5; Mark 10:7,8; 1 Corinthians 6:16)
Note:
All verbs in
bold red
indicate commands, not suggestions!
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On for this
reason, Hodge says...
That is, because the relationship
between husband and wife is more intimate than any other, even than that
between parents and children, therefore a man shall consider all other
relationships subordinate to that which he has with his wife, with whom
he is connected in the bonds of a common life. (Ephesians 5:21-33)
Paul is
quoting Genesis....
Genesis 2:24 For this cause a
man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife;
and they shall become one flesh.
J Vernon McGee
writes that...
Paul here refers to the
relationship that existed in the Garden of Eden between Adam and Eve.
That first couple is a figure of the future union of Christ and the
church as Bridegroom and bride. Eve was created to be a helpmeet for
Adam. She was taken from his side, not molded from the ground as were
the animals. Adam was incomplete until they were together. God fashioned
her, and I think she was the loveliest thing in creation when God
brought her to Adam. One wag has said that she had to be better looking
than man because God had practiced on man but He had experience when He
made woman. She was a helpmeet for Adam. She compensated for what he
lacked. She was made for him and they became one. In the Hebrew the word
for “man” is ish and for “woman” it is isha.
The word is almost the same—she was taken out of man. (McGee,
J V: Thru the Bible Commentary: Thomas Nelson
or
Logos)
Leave
(2641)
(kataleipo from kata = intensifies meaning + leipo
= leave behind) means to leave behind and here speaks of the shift of
the husband's loyalty and devotion from his parents to his spouse.
Expositor's
comments that...
The marriage tie takes precedence
over every other human relationship and for this reason is to be
regarded as inviolable. Nevertheless, what is basically a divine
ordinance is graciously designed for mutual satisfaction and delight. (Gaebelein,
F, Editor: Expositor's Bible Commentary 6-Volume New Testament.
Zondervan Publishing)
Leave
and Cleave
Joined (4347)
(proskollao from prós = to, toward, in compounds prós
implies motion, direction + kollao = to glue) is used 5 times in
the NT, three referring to the marriage bond. The literal meaning is to
glue one thing to another so that it cleaves or adheres. Proskollao
was a medical term used to describe the uniting of wounds. Here this
compound verb denotes the most intimate union. This verb emphasizes not
only permanence but also unity of the two who have been "glued"
together. Take a picture of a husband and another of his wife and glue
them together. Allow time for the glue to set. What happens when you try
to take the two individual pictures apart? Do you see what God is saying
about the dissolution of the marriage covenant between a husband and a
wife?
Hughes
comments that...
there is an amazing unity in
marriage. The sexual union entails mysterious and sacred depths. That
men and women become “one flesh” suggests an exchange of soul and
indicates something of the psychological depth of the marital union.
Marriage ideally produces two people who are as much the same person as
two people can be. Christians in marriage have the same Lord, the same
family, the same children, the same future, and the same destiny. (Hughes,
R. K.: Ephesians: The Mystery of the Body of Christ. Crossway Books)
AND THE TWO
SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH: kai esontai (3PFMI) oi duo eis sarka mian.: (Genesis
2:24; Matthew 19:5; Mark 10:7,8; 1Corinthians 6:16)
The two shall
become one flesh - This is a very real union, mystical to be sure,
but nevertheless very real! We seem to have forgotten the significance
of the sanctity and holiness of this union in our modern cultural abyss.
See related study of
Covenant: As It Relates to Marriage.
In the context of
Paul's charge to the husband to love his wife as Christ loves His Bride,
this verse clearly speaks of and calls for an "unbreakable" love. The
husband is now united to the wife in a supernatural, mystical way and
even as Christ will never break this union with His Bride, Spirit filled
husbands (and wives for that matter) are called to lay aside the "old
man" with his selfish thoughts of separating from one another and of
tearing the "one body" apart!
Perish the thought dear Spirit filled believer!
What a radical concept Paul introduced in an age (first century and our
"modern" era) in which men and women changed partners much like
they changed clothes!
Flesh
(4561)
(sarx)
can be used in many ways in the NT, so context is mandatory to determine
the meaning (this principle applies to all lexicon definitions - make
sure the definition you select fits with the context!). In the present
context, Paul is referring to the divine creation of one man and one
woman into one supernatural body as a functioning "mystical" entity.
John Eadie
writes that...
The love which a son bears to a
father and a mother, is at length surmounted by a more powerful
attachment. He leaves them in whose love and society he has spent his
previous life; so that, while love cements families, love also scatters
them. “He is joined to his wife” in a union nearer and more intimate
than that which united him to his parents; for his wife and he become
“one flesh”—not one in spirit, or in affection, or in pursuit, but in
personality, filled with “coequal and homogeneal fire”—
“The only bliss
Of Paradise that has survived the fall.”
They are “one flesh,” and a junction
so characterized supplied the apostle with language to describe the
union of Christ and His Church—“we are of His flesh and of His bones.”
This doctrine of marriage must have excited surprise when divorce was of
scandalous frequency by an action of apoleipsis or apopempsis in Grecian
states, and with less formality under the emperors in the West (Epistle
of St Paul to the Ephesians).
Ray Stedman
writes the following thoughts in his devotional entitled Husbands And
Wives
This verse is not simply an example
of beautiful, poetic language. There is a fundamental reality behind
this: Husband and wife are not just two people rooming together. Their
lives actually do blend into one another. They actually become one. It
is, therefore, true that what hurts the wife damages the husband. It
cannot help but do so. If he is bitter toward her, it will eat like a
cancer in his own life and heart. That is why, if you have had a
squabble with your spouse, you may find yourself unable to do your work
properly that day.
In Dr. Henry Brandt's helpful book
The Struggle for Peace,
he tells of a woman who came to him because of a great fear she had of
going into supermarkets. She came to him for help in this problem, and
he relied, as he always does, on the wisdom of Scripture. Remembering
the verse "Perfect love drives out fear" (1 John 4:18b), he began to
look for a violation of love in her life, for fear comes when there is
something inhibiting the flow of love. He said to her, "With whom are
you angry?" Finally she was able to realize that she was angry at her
husband for an incident that had occurred a number of years before in a
supermarket when they had had an unpleasant flare-up. As a result, she
was emotionally disturbed whenever she went into a supermarket. When she
dealt with her lack of love, her fear left. What happened, because of
her injury toward him, reflected right back on herself. This is also
true of the husband toward the wife. If we would understand this and
realize that injuring our mate is the same as taking a hammer and
pounding ourselves on the head or neglecting some part of our own body,
we would stop trying to hurt one another. Injury to our mate is bound to
come back upon us in some way.
The final point the apostle makes here is given in verse 33:
"However,
each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself; and the
wife must respect her husband."
Notice that the basis for accomplishing
this is that both partners in the marriage relationship fulfill their
responsibility to Christ, regardless of what the other does. That is the
key. It is not "Wait until he starts loving me, and then I'll submit to
him," or 'Wait until she starts submitting to me, and then I'll love
her," but it is essential to your responsibility before Christ,
regardless of what the other does. To do so breaks through the vicious
circle of marriage conflict and serves to restore peace and permit the
other to fulfill his or her responsibility.
I have seen such unilateral obedience work wonders in marriage
relationships. Husbands and wives have been brought together, harmony
restored in bitterly divided homes, grace and peace made to reign where
there has been battle and conflict, violence, and ugliness before.
Therefore, husbands, love your wife as yourself, and let the wife see
that she respects her husband.
God grant to me the willingness and the grace to be obedient to the Lord
Jesus, who is with me in every circumstance and every relationship of my
life regardless of what the other person does. (Ephesians
5:22-33 Husbands And Wives)
Torrey's Topic
Union With Christ
As Head of the Church -Ephesians
1:22,23; 4:15,16; Colossians 1:18
Christ prayed that all saints might have -John 17:21,23
DESCRIBED AS
Christ being in us -Ephesians 3:17; Colossians 1:27
Our being in Christ -2 Corinthians 12:2; 1 John 5:20
Includes union with the Father -John 17:21; 1 John 2:24
Is of God -1Corinthians 1:30
MAINTAINED BY
Faith -Galatians 2:20; Ephesians 3:17
Abiding in him -John 15:4,7
His word abiding in us -John 15:7; 1 John 2:24; 2 John 1:9
Feeding on him -John 6:56
Obeying him -1 John 3:24
The Holy Spirit witnesses -1 John 3:24
The gift of the Holy Spirit is an evidence of -1 John 4:13
SAINTS
Have, in mind -1Corinthians 2:16; Philippians 2:5
Have, in spirit -1Corinthians 6:17
Have, in love -Solomon 2:16; 7:10
Have, in sufferings -Philippians 3:10; 2 Timothy 2:12
Have, in his death -Romans 6:3-8; Galatians 2:20
Have assurance of -John 14:20
Enjoy, in the Lord’s supper -1Corinthians 10:16,17
Identified with Christ by -Matthew 25:40,45; Acts 9:4; 8:1
Are complete through -Colossians 2:10
Exhorted to maintain -John 15:4; Acts 11:23; Colossians 2:7
Necessary to growth in grace -Ephesians 4:15,16; Colossians 2:19
Necessary to fruitfulness -John 15:4,5
BENEFICIAL RESULTS OF
Righteousness imputed -2 Corinthians 5:21; Philippians 3:9
Freedom from condemnation -Romans 8:1
Freedom from dominion of sin -1 John 3:6
Being created anew -2 Corinthians 5:17
The spirit alive to righteousness -Romans 8:10
Confidence at his coming -1 John 2:28
Abundant fruitfulness -John 15:5
Answers to prayer -John 15:7
They who have, ought to walk as he walked -1 John 2:6
False teachers have not -Colossians 2:18,19
Is indissoluble -Romans 8:35
Punishment of those who have not -John 15:6
Illustrated
Vine and branches -John 15:1,5
Foundation and building -1Corinthians 3:10,11; Ephesians 2:20,21; 1
Peter 2:4-6
Body and members -1Corinthians 12:12,27; Ephesians 5:30
Husband and wife -Ephesians 5:25-32
