Remember (3403) (mnaomai through the idea of fixture in mind or of mental grasp) means to recall information from memory, but without necessarily implication persons have actually forgotten

Remember is in the present imperative calling for the readers to continually keep the prisoners in mind (in context very likely the ones who had been imprisoned for their faith in Messiah).

Andrew Murray (The Holiest of All) writes...

Remember them that are in bonds, as bound with them; them that are evil entreated, as being yourselves also in the body. We know so well in our own body that when one member suffers all the members suffer with it. The word points to loving union with Jesus and His body on earth as close and real. This feeling of sympathy may and must be as quick and real in the spiritual as in the natural body. We are to feel towards the prisoners and the persecuted as if we ourselves were suffering. We have been admitted to a life in the home and the love of God; they who abide there will learn thus to love.

AS THOUGH IN PRISON WITH THEM: os sundedemenoi (RPPMPN):

Prison with - The perfect tense views the completed condition. They had been imprisoned at a point in time and were still in prison. This command is practically relevant because under Roman law individuals could be imprisoned as detention until punishment was meted out and prisoners often had to depend on outside sources for sustenance.  Christians at this time could be arrested and imprisoned for their faith in Christ, and this would make this command even more serious, as those who aided the prisoners might be viewed also as ones who should be imprisoned! This would be counting the cost in a big way. In the Olivet Discourse Jesus made it clear that to minister to a prisoner in the name of Christ is to minister to Christ Himself (Mt 25:36, 40).

In America believers are not (yet) arrested for believing in Jesus as the Only Way to the Father (Jn 14:6),  but many believers suffer throughout the world are being called daily to suffer for their faith in Jesus. How we need to pray for them and share with them as the Lord enables us! (See The Voice of the Martyrs Website)

PRISON; PRISONER [ISBE] -PRISON; PRISONER - priz'-n, priz'-'-n-er, priz'-ner (there are various Hebrew words which are rendered "prison" in the King James Version, among them:

1. Hebrew Words:

(1) cohar, "round house," "fortress" (8 times in Genesis), (2) kele' "restraint," "confinement" (12 times: in historic books, Isaiah, Jeremiah, with "house"), (3) maTTarah, "guard," "sentry" (13 times in Jeremiah and Nehemiah), (4) mahaphekheth, "distorting," i.e. stocks or pillory (4 times), (5) 'ecur, "bond," "fetters" (Eccl 4:14; Jer 37:15); "ward" in the King James Version is usually the rendering for mishmar):

2. In Early Times:

The earliest occurrence of the word "prison" in the King James Version is found in the narrative of Joseph's life in Egypt (the Jahwist). The term used, namely, cohar, means perhaps "round house" or "tower." It seems probable that among the Hebrews there were no special buildings erected as "jails" in the premonarchical period, and perhaps not before the post-exilic period, when the adoption of the civic institutions and customs of surrounding nations prevailed. In Egypt and Assyria, on the contrary, there were probably public buildings corresponding to our modern jails. Among the Hebrews, rooms in connection with the royal palace or the residence of prominent court officials would be used for the purpose.

3. Joseph in Egypt:

According to one narrative (Jahwist) in Genesis the prison in which Joseph was confined had a "keeper," while according to another narrative (the Elohist) the offending members of the royal household, namely, the royal butler and the royal baker, were placed "in ward" with the "captain of the guard" in charge, i.e. in some part of the royal palace. This is still more probable if, instead of "captain of the guard," we should translate "chief of the cooks" i.e. superintendent of the royal kitchen.

4. Causes of Imprisonment:

It was often necessary to restrict the liberty of individuals who for various causes were a menace to those in authority, without inflicting any corporal punishment, e.g. Joseph's brethren were kept "in ward" three days (Gen 42:19); Shimei was forbidden to pass beyond the boundary of Jerusalem (1 Ki 2:36); the person who was caught gathering sticks on the Sabbath was put "in ward" pending his trial (Nu 15:34). In the monarchical period, prophets who criticized the throne were put in prison, e.g. Micaiah by Ahab (1 Ki 22:27), Hanani by Asa (2 Ch 16:10). Hoshea, after his abortive effort to institute an alliance with So or Seve, king of Egypt, was shut up in prison by Shalmaneser (2 Ki 17:4); compare also 2 Ki 25:27 (Jehoiachin in Babylon); Jer 52:11 (Zedekiah in Babylon).

5. Under the Monarchy:

The Book of Jeremiah throws considerable light on the prison system of Jerusalem in the later monarchical period. The prophet was put "in the stocks that were in the upper gate of Benjamin, which was in the house of Yahweh" (20:2). Mere imprisonment was not adequate punishment for the prophet's announcement of Judah's doom; it was necessary to have recourse to the pillory. During the siege of Jerusalem Jeremiah was confined in the "court of the guard, which was in the king of Judah's house" (32:2, etc.). The "court of the guard" was evidently the quarters of the sentry who guarded the royal palace. According to the narrative of Jeremiah 37, the prophet was arrested on a charge of treachery and put in prison "in the house of Jonathan the scribe" (37:15). This verse does not necessarily mean that a private house was used as a prison. The words are capable of another interpretation, namely, that a building known as the "house of Jonathan the scribe" had been taken over by the authorities and converted into a jail. We read in the following verse that the house had a "dungeon" (literally, "house of the pit") and "cabins" or "cells."

6. The Treatment of Prisoners:

The data are not sufficient to enable us to give any detailed description of the treatment of prisoners. This treatment varied according to the character of the offense which led to incarceration. Samson during the period of his imprisonment was compelled to do hard labor (Jdg 16:21). Grinding was the occupation of women, and marked the depth of Samson's humiliation. Dangerous persons were subjected to various kinds of physical mutilation, e.g. Samson was deprived of his sight. This was a common practice in Assyria (2 Ki 25:7). The thumbs and great toes of Adonibezek were cut off to render him incapable of further resistance (Jdg 1:6).

Various forms of torture were in vogue. Hanani the seer was put into the pillory by Asa (for "in a prison house" we should render "in the stocks"; see the Revised Version margin). In Jer 29:26 for "prison," we should render "stocks" (so the Revised Version (British and American)) or "pillory," and for "stocks," "collar" (as in the Revised Version margin). the King James Version renders a different Hebrew word by "stocks" in Job (13:27; 33:11). There was a special prison diet (1 Ki 22:27), as well as a prison garb (2 Ki 25:29).

7. Other Hebrew Words:

There are other Hebrew words rendered "prison" (sometimes incorrectly) in the King James Version. In Ps 142:7, the word which is translated "prison" means a "place of execution," and is derived from a root which denotes, for instance, the isolation of the leper (Lev 13:5; compare Is 24:22; 42:7). In Is 53:8 "oppression" not "prison" is the correct translation while in Is 61:1 the Hebrew denotes "opening of the eyes," rather than "opening of the prison." Prisoners are promised "light after darkness, gleam after gloom."

8. In the New Testament:

In the New Testament "prison" generally occurs for the Greek word phulake, which corresponds to the Hebrew word mishmar, referred to above (Mt 5:25; Mk 6:17; Lk 3:20; Acts 5:19; 1 Pet 3:19). In Rev 18:2, the King James Version renders this word by two different words, namely, "hold" and "cage"; the Revised Version (British and American) employs "hold" in each case (the Revised Version margin "prison"). In one passage "ward" is the rendering in the King James Version (Acts 12:10). In connection with the imprisonment of John the term used is desmoterion, "place of bonds" or "fetters" (Mt 11:2); the same word is used in the case of Peter and John (Acts 5:21,23), and of Paul and Silas (Acts 16:26). But the more common term is also found in these narratives. In Acts 12:17 "prison" renders a Greek word which means "dwelling." In Acts 5:18 the King James Version, "prison" is the rendering for another Greek word, namely, teresis, "watching" or "ward" (the Revised Version (British and American) "ward"). In Acts 4:3, the King James Version employs "hold" as the rendering for the same word. This would correspond to the modern "police station" or "lockup."

Marriage is to be held in honor among all - The words "is to be held" are added to make the reading more fluid. More literally this reads "honourable the marriage in all". Compare Young's Literal...

honourable is the marriage in all, and the bed undefiled, and whoremongers and adulterers God shall judge.

This verse represents a refutation of the practice of asceticism which downgraded marriage.

Regard for marriage and for the physical intimacy of marriage is an essential aspect of the pursuit of holiness (Heb 12:14-note).

Honor - Note that this is the first word in the Greek for emphasis. "Precious the marriage in all"

Honor (5093) (timios - see study of related verb timao) literally speaks of things which are costly, precious or valuable (Re 17:4-note) or of persons who are "precious" and thus are highly regarded, esteemed or honored (Acts 5:34, 17:34). Timios describes that which possesses exceptional value (costly, of great worth). Timios was used to refer to precious metals and stones.

There are 13 uses of timios in the NT - Acts 5:34; 20:24; 1Co 3:12 (referring to works that endure eternally for they are built upon or with "gold, silver and precious stones"); Heb 13:4-note; James 5:7; 1Pe 1:19-note (referring to the "precious blood" of Jesus); 2Pe 1:4-note (the "precious and magnificent promises" of God); Re 17:4-note; Re 18:12-note, Re 18:16-note; Re 21:11-note, Re 21:19-note - observe the striking contrast between the two "women" in the last part of Revelation). The NAS translates it - dear(1), honor(1), precious(8), respected(1), very costly(2). The KJV translates it - precious 8, most precious 2, more precious 1, dear 1, honourable 1, had in reputation 1

There are 33 uses of timios in the Septuagint - 1Sa 3:1; 2Sa 12:30; 1Ki. 5:17; 7:9, 10, 11; 10:2, 10, 11; 1Chr. 20:2; 29:2; 2Chr. 3:6; 9:1, 9, 10; 32:27; Ezra 4:10; Job 28:16; Ps 19:10; 21:3; 116:15; Pr 3:15; 6:26; 8:11, 19; 12:27; 20:6; 24:4; 31:10; Eccl 10:1; Je 15:19; Lam 4:2; Da 11:38; Ho 11:7

The Lord's purpose for His creation of Adam and Eve was that it was to be a permanent, monogamous marriage (Ge 2:21, 22, 23, 24; Mt 19:4, 5, 6), with children raised in the corresponding family unit. Any other type of sexual relationship is wrong (NO MATTER WHAT SOCIETY SAYS!), whether pre-marital, extra-marital, homosexual, incestuous or anything else. How serious is this issue?

"God will judge" the illegal affairs and this even includes masturbation (see Jesus stern warning in Mt 5:28-note,Mt 5:29-note, Mt 5:30-note and note His definition of "adultery"! This is serious business!)

Marriage is honored when the husband is the head (1Co 11:3, Ep 5:23-note), the wife submits (1Pe 3:1-note, 1Pe 3:6-note), there is mutual love and respect (1Pe 3:7-note). Marriage vows must not be taken lightly. Marriage means fidelity and commitment to one's spouse. Only as partners honor marriage can sexual union bring its intended fulfillment. (See Pr 5:15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23; 1Co 7:2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7.)

There were two dangerous extremes in the early church and one asceticism and the other libertinism (quality of a person those who unrestrained by convention or morality and especially leading to a dissolute life). Some first-century Christian ascetics (practicing strict self-denial as a measure of personal and especially spiritual discipline) considered “virginity as necessary to Christian perfection.” This later developed in the second century into the Montanist movement, which later spawned celibate monasticism. These individuals falsely concluded that those who choose marriage choose inferior spirituality. Wrong! I have been married for 38 years (2008) and the greatest sanctifying "tool" in my life is my wife! I am far more "spiritual" with her than I ever would have been without her. The logic (illogic) of these celibates dishonors the God ordained institution of marriage. The ascetics were bad, but the real assault on the integrity and honor of marriage came from the libertines who saw marriage as irrelevant as they pursued unbridled sexual fulfillment. Also wrong! Very wrong!

Kent Hughes writes that...

Today radical secular wisdom claims that marriage impedes self-actualization—an unforgivable "sin". The main attacks today are mostly libertine. For many, “marriage” is at best a provisional arrangement between two people (sexual orientation is irrelevant) that can be dissolved whenever one wishes, for any reason. To be sure, not all conventional attitudes toward marriage are as extreme, though there is a growing skepticism regarding love and marriage. As one person sarcastically put it, “Love: temporary insanity curable by marriage.”

But what does this have to do with the survival of the church? Everything! I can think of no more efficient way to sink that ship than through adultery and sexual immorality. The reasons are elementary. Immorality perverts theology. I have seen this time and time again with preachers—famous and unknown. They become involved in a secret affair (perhaps several) and yet keep on preaching. But over time an amazing phenomenon takes place—they unconsciously detach themselves from truth. Like the ancient Averroists, they divide truth, so that there is a truth for them and another truth for others. They may not articulate this, but they become practical relativists, and their relativism so eats away at their belief that many, after the trauma of discovery, leave the faith. Tragic shipwreck!

The damage to the church is immense. Preachers caught in such sins suffer a reduction in spiritual ethos. They increasingly sound like old-time railroad conductors who loudly invite people to embark to destinations they themselves have never visited and to which they are incapable of traveling. Powerlessness becomes the hallmark of their rhetoric.

And, of course, they discredit the Word. I can think of no better way to damn the soul of a junior-higher who is just beginning to experience spiritual stirrings than through the fall of a pastor, Sunday school teacher, or other spiritual leader. There can be no more efficient way to dampen the spiritual aspiration of a young family man than adulterous leaders. Because such sin is a particularly lethal sin against the church, I have at times prayed this with my ministerial colleagues: “Lord, if adultery would lie in the future for any of us should we continue to live—then take us home now.” Better dead than damage the church! (Hughes, R. K. Hebrews: An Anchor for the Soul. Volume 1.  Crossway Books; Volume 2 or Logos)

Torrey's Topic
Marriage

1. Divinely instituted. Ge 2:24.
2. A covenant relationship. Mal 2:4.

3. Designed for
a. The happiness of man. Ge 2:18.
b. Increasing the human population. Ge 1:28; 9:1.
c. Raising up godly seed. Mal 2:15.
d. Preventing fornication. 1Co 7:2.

4. The expectation of the promised seed of the woman an incentive to, in the early age. Ge 3:15; 4:1.
5. Lawful in all. 1Co 7:2,28; 1Ti 5:14.
6. Honourable for all. Heb 13:4.
7. Should be only in the Lord. 1Co 7:39.
8. Expressed by

a. Joining together. Mt 19:6.
b. Making affinity. 1Ki 3:1.
c. Taking to wife. Ex 2:1.
d. Giving daughters to sons, and sons to daughters. Deut 7:3; Ezr 9:12.

9. Indissoluble during the joint lives of the parties. Mt 19:6; Ro 7:2,3; 1Co 7:39.
10. Early introduction of polygamy. Ge 4:19.
11. Contracted in patriarchal age with near relations. Ge 20:12; 24:24; 28:2.
12. Often contracted by parents for children. Ge 24:49-51; 34:6,8.
13. Should be with consent of parents. Ge 28:8; Jdg14:2,3.
14. Consent of the parties necessary to. Ge 24:57,58; 1Sa 18:20; 25:41.
15. Parents might refuse to give their children in. Ex 22:17; Deut 7:3.

16. The Jews

a. Forbidden to contract, with their near relations. Le 18:6.
b. Forbidden to contract with idolaters. Deut 7:3,4; Jos 23:12; Ezr 9:11,12.
c. Often contracted with foreigners. 1Ki 11:1; Ne 13:23.
d. Sometimes guilty of polygamy. 1Ki 11:1,3.
e. Careful in contracting for their children. Ge 24:2,3; 28:1,2.
f. Betrothed themselves some time before. Deut 20:7; Jdg14:5,7,8; Mt 1:18.
g. Contracted when young. Pr 2:17; Joe 1:8.
h. Often contracted, in their own tribe. Ex 2:1; Nu 36:6-13; Lk 1:5,27.
i. Obliged to contract with a brother’s wife who died without seed. Deut 25:5; Mt 22:24.
j. Considered being debarred from, a reproach. Is 4:1.
k. Considered being debarred from, a cause of grief. Jdg11:38.
l. Often punished by being debarred from. Jer 7:34; 16:9; 25:10.
m. Were allowed divorce from, because of hardness of their hearts. Deut 24:1; Mt 19:7,8.
n. Exempted from going to war immediately after. Deut 20:7

17. Priest not to contract, with divorced or improper persons. Le 21:7.
18. The high priest not to contract, with a widow or a divorced or profane person. Le 21:14.
19. Contracted at the gate and before witnesses. Ru 4:1,10,11.
20. Modes of demanding women in. Ge 24:3,4; 34:6,8; 1Sa 25:39,40.
21. Elder daughters usually given in, before the younger. Ge 29:26.
22. A dowry given to the woman’s parents before. Ge 29:18; 34:12; 1Sa 18:27,28; Ho 3:2.
23. Celebrated

a. With great rejoicing. Jer 33:11; Jn 3:29.
b. With feasting. Ge 29:22; Jdg14:10; Mt 22:2,3; Jn 2:1-10.
c. For seven days. Jdg14:12.

24. A benediction pronounced after. Ge 24:60; Ru 4:11,12.
25. The bride

a. Received presents before. Ge 24:53.
b. Given a handmaid at. Ge 24:59; 29:24,29.
c. Adorned with jewels for. Is 49:18; 61:10.
d. Gorgeously apparelled. Ps 45:13,14.
e. Attended by bridesmaids. Ps 45:9.
f. Stood on the right of bridegroom. Ps 45:9.
g. Called to forget her father’s house. Ps 45:10.

26. The bridegroom

a. Adorned with ornaments. Is 61:10.
b. Attended by many friends. Jdg14:11; Jn 3:29.
c. Presented with gifts. Ps 45:12.
d. Crowned with garlands. Song 3:11.
e. Rejoiced over the bride. Is 62:5.
f. Returned with the bride to his house at night. Mt 25:1-6.

27. Garments provided for guests at. Mt 22:12.
28. Infidelity of those contracted in, punished as if married. Deut 22:23,24; Mt 1:19.
29. Illustrative of

a. God’s union with the Jewish nation. Is 54:5; Jer 3:14; Ho 2:19,20.
b. Christ’s union with his church. Eph 5:23,24,32.

Baker's Evangelical Dictionary of Biblical Theology has the following entry for marriage...

Marriage - An intimate and complementing union between a man and a woman in which the two become one physically, in the whole of life. The purpose of marriage is to reflect the relationship of the Godhead and to serve him. Although the fall has marred the divine purpose and function of marriage, this definition reflects the God-ordained ideal for marriage from the beginning.

The Image of God. Genesis 1:26, 27 declares that mankind (adam) was created in God's image with a plural composition of male and female, each separately in God's image (cf. Ge 5:1, 2, 3; 9:6; 1 Cor 11:7; Col 3:10; James 3:9). Although the image of God is never defined in Scripture, contexts in which God's image are discussed must define the concept (cf. 2 Cor 3:18; and Col 3:10). God's image in Genesis 1 includes ruling, creativity (procreation), reasoning power, decision-making, and relationship.

The relational aspect of God's image is reflected in the bringing together of male and female in "one flesh" (Gen 1:27; 2:21, 22, 23, 24). This oneness with sexual differences portrays various aspects of God's image: same nature and essence, equal members, intimate relationship, common purpose, and distinct personalities with different roles, including authority and submission. In the Trinity the Father leads, the Son submits to the Father, and the Holy Spirit submits to both the Father and the Son. However, all three are fully and equally deity. Likewise, male and female in the marriage relationship are of the same nature and essence, equal as persons (cf. Gal 3:28), intimate in relationship, common in purpose, but distinct personalities with different roles: the husband leads and the wife submits to his leadership (cf. Eph 5:31). Marriage appears designed to reflect the same relational unity-in-plurality as the Godhead. Marriage, the most intimate human relationship, was appropriately chosen to reflect this relational aspect of the divine image. Each sex alone incompletely exhibits this part of the divine image. This open intimate relational aspect of God's image, reflected in marriage, was marred by the fall (cf. Gen 3:7, 10), causing each mate to hide (cover oneself) from each other and from God.

Marriage is the most basic and significant social relationship to humankind. This relationship must be nurtured and maintained for the welfare of all. Without marriage, society will fail.

God's design for marital relationship is heterosexual, not homosexual, and monogamous, not polygamous. This relational aspect of God's image in marriage has analogues portrayed in Yahweh's relation with Israel (Is 54:5; Jer 31:32; Ezek 16:8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14; Hosea 2:14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20) as well as in Christ's relation with the church (Eph 5:21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33; cf. 1Cor 11:1, 2, 3; 2 Cor 11:2; Rev 19:7, 8, 9). Israel is portrayed as Yahweh's wife (Is 54:5; Jer 31:32; Ezek 16:8-14; Hosea 2:14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20). Her idolatrous unfaithfulness and disobedience to Yahweh are frequently depicted as spiritual "adultery" (Num 25:1-4; Judges 2:17; Jer 3:20; Ezek 16:15-59; 23:1-48; Hosea 1:2; 2:2-13; 3:3) for which she was punished by captivity. Yahweh "divorced" his "unfaithful wife" (Is 50:1; Jer 3:8; Hosea 2:2), but ultimately will have compassion and delightfully restore her to faithfulness and holiness (Is 54; 62:4-5; Ezek 16:53-63; Hosea 2:14-3:1).

New Testament marriage imagery describes the relationship between Christ and his church (cf. 2 Cor 11:2; Eph 5:21-33; Rev 19:7, 8, 9). The church, Christ's bride, is sacrificially loved by Christ, just as a husband should love his wife (Eph 5:25,28, 29, 30,33). The husband's responsibility is leadership, even as Christ is the head of the church, his body (Eph 5:23). The wife responds submissively to her husband's sacrificial love like the church submits to Christ's (Eph 5:22,24,33). The husband's love assists her in becoming holy and blameless before God, even as Christ presents the church without blemish to the Father (Eph 5:26-28). Christ's relationship with the church becomes the functional model for a marriage relationship.

God commanded the male and female to perform two specific functions: procreation ("fruitful and multiply") and ruling over the earth ("subdue" and "rule") (Gen 1:28). These are functions that reflect God's image. Humankind (male and female) receive God-ordained authority to rule over the rest of creation, but not over each other.

Human reproduction comes through intimate sexual union designed only for the marriage relationship. Cohabitation abuses the procreative nature of the marriage relationship. While reproduction is a divine purpose of marriage, some couples are unable to have children for various physical reasons. This does not make their marriage second-rate or inferior. However, a married couple should desire to obey the divine injunction of procreation if possible. Children are one manifestation of the "one flesh" of marriage. The procreative injunction obviously precludes homosexual "marriages."

The Marriage Union as God's Work. God brings a man and a woman together in marriage (Matt 19:6; cf. Eve to Adam, Rebecca to Isaac ). It is not humankind's prerogative to separate what God has chosen to put together (Matt 19:6).

As creator of the marriage relationship, God becomes the essential supporting party to a marriage, giving wisdom, discretion, understanding, and love to protect the union and to enable it to honor God (Prov 2:6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16; 1 Cor 13:4, 5, 6, 7, 8). A marriage can glorify God and function properly only when both partners are believers in the Messiah, Jesus. Then the Holy Spirit guides and enables them in their roles and functions. Continued reliance upon God is imperative for believing spouses.

Marriage as God's Norm for Humankind. God made man a relational being in his own image. Therefore, there is the need for intimate relationship within humankind (Ge 2:18). Such a relationship is also necessary for the reproduction and multiplication of humankind. Without the fall, probably no one would have ever been single. Perfect people would have yielded perfect marriages. Sin brought flaws in humans that sometimes make it difficult to find or sustain a suitable marriage relationship. Being single for life is an exception and, therefore, is declared to be a gift from God (1 Cor 7:7). The single person is normally less encumbered in God's work. So, although marriage appears to be God's norm, singleness is neither more nor less spiritual than marriage (1 Cor 7:32, 33, 34, 35, 36).

The Nature of Marriage. Complementarity. The woman was created as "a helper suitable" for the man (ezer kenegdo) (Gen 2:18). The English "complement" best conveys the meaning of neged. A wife is a "helper" who "complements" her husband in every way. A helper always subordinates self-interests when helping another, just as Paul reminds us in Philippians 2:1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11. A helping role is a worthy one, not implying inferiority. The wife, therefore, helps the husband to lead their family to serve and glorify God. The husband also complements his wife so that together they become a new balanced entity that God uses in an enhanced way.

A new permanent union (Gen 2:24). "Cleaving" in Genesis 2:24 pictures a strong bond between the members of this union. The marriage bond was to be permanent. Separation or termination of the marriage union was not an option before sin entered the world and death with it (Ge 3:1, 2, 3, 4, 5). All later revelation shows that separation/divorce was because of sin (Deut 24:1, 2, 3, 4; Ezra 9-10; Mal 2:14; Matt 5:31, 32; 19:1-12; Mark 10:1-12; Luke 16:18; 1 Cor 7:1-16, 39). God's ideal was for marriage to be permanent and exclusive.

One flesh (Gen 2:24). "One flesh" involves the unity of the whole person: purpose, physical, and life—a unity whereby the two become a new, God-designed, balanced life. They counterbalance each other's strengths and weaknesses. Sexually the two become "one flesh" physically as reflected in their offspring. God's ideal exclusiveness of the "one flesh" relationship disallows any other relationship: homosexuality, polygamy, adultery, premarital sex, concubinage, incest, bestiality, cultic prostitution. These and other sexual perversions violate the "oneness" of the marriage relationship and were often punishable by death (Lev 20:1-19; Deut 22:13-27; cf. Rom 1:26-32). Becoming "one flesh" is used in Scripture for the consummating sexual act of marriage.

These aspects of "one flesh" argue against premarital sex, promiscuity, and perversion of the sexual act. The body is the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor 6:19), so believers should be holy in their sexual conduct (Lev 19:2; 1 Thess 4:3, 4, 5, 6; 1 Peter 1:15, 16), keeping marriage pure.

Intimacy. Commitment to exclusive sexual intimacy is treated with dignity, considered honorable and undefiled (Heb 13:4). Mutual consent is required for any temporal abstinence from sexual relations (1 Cor 7:1, 2, 3, 4, 5). Neither spouse is to exploit the other sexually nor use sex to gratify passionate lust (1 Thess 4:3, 4, 5, 6, 7). One is to delight always in the wife of his youth (cf. Prov 5:15, 16, 17, 18, 19; Eccl 9:9). This intimate relationship is encouraged by God's portrayal of its beauty and dignity in the Song of Songs.

Covenant commitment. The covenant analogy attests the commitment between two married partners (Pr 2:17; Mal 2:14). Emphasis is upon an agreement, a commitment, not upon an analogy of conditionality and unconditionality of some biblical covenants that would extend the marriage covenant analogy beyond its expected scope. This marriage commitment, and faithfulness to it, preclude sexual relations with anyone except one's spouse (Ex 20:14; Lev. 18,20; Rom 1:24, 25, 26, 27). Although kings frequently employed marriages to seal foreign treaties in the ancient Near East, such commitments were spiritual as well as physical adultery.

Roles. Although male and female are equal in relationship to Christ, the Scriptures give specific roles to each in marriage. Paul, in continually emphasizing the terms "head" and "submit, " summarizes the basic role of husbands and wives respectively.

The husband is to assume headship/leadership (1 Cor 11:3; Eph 5:23). The normal meaning of biblical headship is leadership with authority, as exemplified in Christ (cf. 1 Cor 11:1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10; Eph 1:22; 4:15; 5:23). Headship is a benevolent responsibility without disdaining condescension and patronizing of the woman (cf. Matt 7:12; Luke 22:26; 1Peter 3:7). Although the husband leads as Christ leads the church, the husband does not have all the rights and authority of Christ. He leads his wife toward dependence upon Christ, not upon himself, for all human leaders are fallible. The husband leads like Christ, being considerate of his wife with respect and knowledge. He considers the ideas of those he leads, because they may be better than his own. Leadership's goal is not to show the leader's superiority, but to elicit all the strengths of people for the desired objective. Headship is not male domination, harshness, oppression, and reactionary negativism (cf. 2 Cor 1:24; Eph 5:29; Col 3:19), for "no one ever hated his own body."

Leadership assumes the responsibility to initiate and implement spiritual and moral planning for a family. Others, however, should also think, plan, initiate, and give input. The husband, however, must accept the burden of making the final choice in times of disagreement, although seldom should this be needed.

The husband's leadership and its authority is a God-given responsibility to be carried out in humility. Inappropriate use of leadership should be curbed by the unique intimacy and union implied in the phrases "one flesh, " "no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, " and "joint heirs of the grace of life" (Eph 5:29, 30, 31; 1 Peter 3:7).

The husband leads with an attitude of love. Christ's love for the church provides the model (Eph 5:25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31,32, 33; Col 3:19). The husband loves his wife as he would his own body (Eph 5:25), nourishing and cherishing her (v. 29). He gives himself sacrificially for her benefit as Christ sacrificially loved the church. Such love rules out treating his wife like a child or servant; rather he assists her to be a "fellow-heir."

Biblical love thinks first of the other person (cf. 1 Cor 13). It is a mental decision and commitment. God also gave emotions of love that should follow the mental act of love else the emotional aspect becomes infatuation or lust. Love protects, cares, trusts, and delights in the best for the other. The husband initiates love (Eph 5:25; 1 Peter 3:7). He who loves his wife surely loves himself.

The husband is to treat his wife with respect and considerateness (1 Peter 3:7). The husband bestows honor upon his wife. He always shows respect for her privately and in public.

The husband appropriately provides for and protects his wife. This does not mean that the wife cannot assist in supporting the family, for Proverbs 31 demonstrates that a godly wife may surely do so. The husband should always be willing to suffer for her safety.

The wife submits to her husband's headship (Eph 5:21, 22, 23, 24; Col 3:18; 1 Peter 3:1-6). Submission's basic meaning is "to submit or subordinate to a higher authority." It is a predisposition to yield to the husband's leadership and a willingness to follow his authority. The husband does not command the wife to do this. The verb implies that she does this voluntarily. Submission does not imply that the wife is inferior, less intelligent, or less competent. Christ submitted to the Father but was not inferior or less God than the Father (1 Cor 11:3; 15:28). Submission does not indicate that the wife puts her husband in the place of Christ. Christ is supreme in all things! The submissive wife does not give up independent thought. Believing wives with unbelieving husbands think independently, while still submitting to their husbands (1 Cor 7:13, 14). She might seek to influence her husband for right and to guide him in righteousness (1 Peter 3:1-2). Submission never signifies that a wife gives in to her husband's every demand. If demands are unrighteous, she submits to her higher authority, Jesus.

A wife submits to her own husband. Relationships with other men are different in areas of submission and leadership.

Some feel that Ephesians 5:21 argues that the husband and wife are equally submissive. In its context the best understanding sees this verse as an introduction to three particular areas where people are submissive to one another: wives to husbands (Eph 5:22-33); children to parents (Ep 6:1, 2, 3, 4); and servants to masters (Ep 6:5, 6, 7, 8, 9). Mutual submissiveness does not fit the latter two categories.

A wife should submit with an attitude of honor, reverence, and respect (Psalm 45:11; Eph 5:33). A wife affirms and nurtures her husband's leadership. She submits in the same manner that she and the church submit to Christ (1 Peter 3:6). This analogy provides a good gauge. The wife demonstrates a gentle and quiet spirit (1 Peter 3:4), not demanding her own way or insisting on her rights. A wife's respect is primarily for the role of leadership that her husband occupies, not necessarily for his merits, though that would be the ideal. She recognizes the God-given leadership with regard and deference.

Effect of the Fall on Marriage. The fall made human hearts hard toward God and toward each other. The relational aspect of God's image became marred. Rebellion against submission to male leadership was Satan's initial temptation (Gen 3:1-6, 17; contra. Eph 5:33; 1 Peter 3:1). Male domination and harshness crept into leadership (cf. Col 3:19; 1 Peter 3:7). Sin caused polygamy, concubinage, incest, adultery, rape, prostitution, and all kinds of immorality (cf. Lev. 18, 20; Rom 1:26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32) to damage or destroy the marriage relationship. Marriage commitments are violated. Divorce, premarital sex, and couples living together out of wedlock would never have occurred had not sin entered the world. The fall severely damaged the marriage relationship.

For marriage to function now according to God's ideal, believers in Christ need to marry only believers. Whenever God directly brought a man and woman together in marriage, both were believers. Although pagan customs encouraged marriage with anyone (cf. Gen 16), Israel was given explicit commands not to marry foreigners who would lead them to worship foreign deities (Deut 7:1, 2, 3, 4; 13:6-11; 17:1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7; 20:17; 23:2). New Testament believers are also not to be "unequally yoked" with unbelievers (2Cor 6:14), meaning any action causing the union of believer with nonbeliever, or non-believing ways, must be avoided. - Ralph H. Alexander (Baker's Evangelical Dictionary of Biblical Theology)

AND THE MARRIAGE BED BE UNDEFILED : kai e koite amianto: (Heb 12:16; 1Co 6:9; Ga 5:19,21; Ep 5:5; Col 3:5,6; Re 22:15 )

Marriage bed...be - The word "marriage" is added but literally it simply reads "bed". Similarly the verb "be" is not present in the Greek but added to give flow to the sentence.

Bed (2845) (koite) refers to a place or structure on which one can lie down and in this context is a figurative way to refer to the sexual relationship between a husband and his wife.

Undefiled (283) (amiantos from a = negates what follows + miaino = to defile by staining, as with color) means without contamination, unpolluted, untainted, unstained (stainless), unsoiled, without uncleanness or impurity. The idea is free from that by which the nature of a thing is deformed or debased, or its force or vigor is impaired.  In secular Greek writings amiantos was used to describe things such as unstained hands, heart, flesh or body. Aeschylus calls the sea simply "the undefiled".

“it is a remarkable testimony to the reign of sin, and therefore of imperfection, of decay, of death throughout this whole fallen world, that as often as we desire to set forth the glory, purity, and perfection of that other, higher world toward which we strive, we are almost inevitably compelled to do this by the aid of negatives; by the denying to that higher order of things the leading features and characteristics of this.” (see Re 21:1-note  Re 22:3-note)

To keep the marriage bed undefiled was a radical concept in the first century Greco-Roman world, and thus believers  early proved themselves

to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world" (Php 2:15, Mt 5:16)

Kent Hughes comments that...

Christian sexual morality was unique in the pagan world and a source of wonder. And it has become increasingly so today in a world that considers adultery irrelevant, purity abnormal, and sex a “right” (however and with whomever one may get it) and that has invented the egregious term “recreational sex.” We Christians are called to be outrageously pure—to be a source of wonder and even derision to this glandular world. From the beginning to the end of Hebrews, the abiding concern of the author has been to so instruct the tiny Hebrew church that it would stay afloat on the increasingly hostile seas of first-century Roman culture. Their ship was a microscopic dot on the massive billows of the official pagan/secular enterprise—and eminently vulnerable. It appeared to outside eyes that the external forces could sink it at will. But the author knew that the internal threat to the church was far more deadly. In fact, he knew that it could ride out any storm if things were right on the inside. He knows that nothing will sink a church faster than moral wavering in respect to sex, materialism, or mental outlook. Here is intimate advice regarding how to keep our ship afloat. It is so essential that any church that ignores it will founder and possibly even sink. (Ibid)

David Guzik writes feels that...

Perhaps through a past of sexual sin, many people have a difficult time really believing that the marriage bed is undefiled. Guilt and sexual hang-ups are appropriate to extra-marital sex, but not in marital sex. But this is where the guilt and sexual hang-ups often exist, and where they most frequently cause trouble.

The enemy of our souls wants to do everything he can to encourage sex outside of the marriage bed, and he wants to do everything he can to discourage sex inside the marriage bed. We need to recognize this strategy and not give it a foothold among us.

Though God allows real freedom in the variety of sexual expression in marriage, all must be done with a concern for the other's needs and in love (1 Corinthians 7:1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and Ephesians 5:21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33). (Commentary)

FOR FORNICATORS AND ADULTERERS GOD WILL JUDGE: pornous gar kai moichous krinei (3SFAI) o theos: (1Co 6:9 Ga 5:19,21 Ep 5:5) (Ps 50:16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22; Malachi 3:5; 1Co 5:13; 2Co 5:10)

Bruce writes that...

Fornication and adultery are not synonymous in the New Testament: adultery implies unfaithfulness by either party to the marriage vow, while the word translated "fornication" covers a wide range of sexual irregularities.

Spurgeon writes...

And terrible will be their doom when God does judge them. They may think that, because they sin in secret, therefore they shall escape punishment; but it shall not be so. Whether men judge them or not, God will judge them.

As Ray Stedman reminds us...

Nonconformity to the world must certainly involve these areas. The loose sexual standards of our generation and the intense materialistic spirit of this age constitute a constant peril to our hearts, and we must beware of them. We must realize that God has undertaken to sustain the sacredness of marriage and that He unceasingly, unrelentingly judges violations of it. Therefore, we dare not heed the fine sounding declarations being made today about a "new morality," as though we had passed beyond the ancient standards and they no longer had significance.

As this writer reminds us, God judges the immoral and adulterous. He does not mean that God looses lightning bolts from heaven against them, or that he causes terrible diseases to come upon them; these are not the forms of judgment. But we can see the judgment of God in the terrible tempest of mental pressures and crackups which sweep like a plague across this land. They are due to the breakdown of moral standards.